before the day ends

Im not a birthday person since God knows when... I really dont know the last time i celebrate it and i even blog last year that i dont like people greeting me...

The thing is i cant hide myself all the time. I used to be more comfortable allowing this day to be as ordinary as possible, (there is even a point where i turned off my phone) i keep it to myself and wished that nobody would try to look at any list that indicates this day. I dont know when i started being uncomfortable with this day (sometimes i wish i could just skip this day) maybe its just that im not used to people wishing me a happy one or i built this notion that they just greet me like a robot programed to walk and talk like humans, just a mechanical obligation or an impulse without meaning sort of a greeting.

i dont like people saying empty words. I used to have meaningful and wonderful birthdays when i was younger and you just have no idea how fun it is to have this day before, but bitchy life happens and the people i celebrate it with are gone leaving me with nothing but nonchalant greetings, empty ones. I dont care about the party i dont care about the celebration i just wanted and always hoped that people would greet me not just because i have a party or food to share but the fact that this is my birthday.

And today i felt for a very long time that people finally greeted me with more warmth and consciousness that yes this is in fact a very important day.

To everyone Thank You! For sticking with the self-rightous-frigid -me that knows nothing but my passion for my fandom! Ive been very selfish really and i just cant imagine anyone really caring what day is this for me. I dont care for the most part but since you do who am i to ignore your greetings!


This is going to be hard but i'll try my best to care more and get out of my comfort zones. I should fix my life right now, im not getting younger (but im young really... i feel young!) and should start investing with import things in life, relationships with everyone. I'll try not to be so distant and maybe i should lessen the area of my personal space, I'll try but i cant promise though. Ahahaha!

Again for everyone Thank you for changing my mind regarding birthdays! ^_^

Lazy Saturday. Irrashaimase. Cubao X


So my brother shows up but im not spending time with him, not till next week i guess.

i wanted to upload some photos here but thats so time consuming unlike in Multiply where it uploads every jpg automatically in my hard drive...


Irrashaimase event in Ali Mall and Some cafe in Cubao X, Totally clueless, gomen.

PHOTOS HERE


I cant have a decent download these past few days, makes me bitchy. AMPF. Im hoping for a better download day tomorrow. Damn.

STILL.

STILL.


I wonder.
I suck at conversations especially receiving complains on who screwed one life is. I believe our life is as twisted as everybody else so whats with the "Are-You-Ok, Coz-Im-Not!" seriously why tell me such things if you arent there when my wailing turn on how unfair the world arrived? i was never given a chance because i was designed to be strong and be on the receiving end of complains.

Tell you what,

Why tell me? i dont care.

I dont want to be bitchy but why do i have to hear these things when nobody heard mine? Nobody. not like i wanted you to hear.
Whatever.

+++++++++++

There is toooo much negativity in my past few blogpost, Please forgive me. Im just sick of
HOW EVERYBODY IS SCREWED UP AND I HAPPEN TO BE THE NICE ONE TO LISTEN TO ALL OF THEM.

NAKAKAPAGOD MAKINIG SA NEGATIVITY NO!

So now I FORBID EVERYBODY TO TALK ABOUT HOW YOUR LIFE SUCKS BIG TIME! Or at least dont let me hear them.

+++++



Let's have a 180 degrees turn shall we?

THE NEW HAIR KILLS ME. SUAVE.
Sho makes me shiver, weakens my knees, tightens my chest, lose my breath, torn my ovaries and much more not public-post ideal.

On fandom note i started converting... Yes we just cant get enough of fangirls. More fangirls more fun!
Btw i shared a few Smut fics to some officemates and fortunately to the fandom they like it! unfortunately to their souls i think i just corrupted their innocence! LOL!

Too much Arashi news...

new single, movie for Nino, Individual Drama Sp for Jun, Sho, and Ohno, a Drama for Aiba, PV collection and more projects and a few more concerts for the 10th year. Too much going on... Fandom how you keep me sane, hats off to that!

This will be the last post with NEGA Stuff on it. Ang bigat basahin eh... At ayokong mag reread tapos me ganito shit ang pangit
talaga ng ganito eh... I rather not have Life stuff kaysa puro ka bwisitan lang. Nakakapagod lang makinig sa mga hinaing ng iba tapos un problema mo di mo naman maibroadcast. AMPF. Ano ba ko confession box?

is impulsive, then dormant.

is impulsive, then dormant.


When i want something i want it now. If i cant have it, then forget it.

I have to disciple myself more and start doing things that i already started.

++++

I want to write a SMUT FIC. i dont know how! Ahahahahahaha... Oh but i got a plot already...

Can somebody share his or her experience knowledge in this field? Im a perv, OFFICIALLY. As if thats a secret.

++++

Why does everybody talk about love? Sometimes i feel that people think im weird for me not having sharing stuffs while they on the otherhand, overly indulge themselves with their love whereabouts.

When i told joanna that i got no plans of screaming for the world to know if i got someone she said that im selfish. Seriously. What's selfish in that? As if anybody cares. lol.

Sometimes i wonder if a boytoy can actually make one less bored. I guess they are designed to be played, so yes one cant be bored. But having a fickle mind like mine i seriouly doubt the long existence of a boytoy. As if.

++++

I need someone to fuck my mind. Like tell me an unusual story, weird things you did something that could actually bring back and energized my life. I need to be inspired cause im feed up with silly games and overrated sick stories.

++++

Arashi is the only colorful existence in my life.
THE REST BORES ME AND DOESNT NOT REGISTERED AS "INTERESTING" IN MY SYSTEM.

Guess what. In less than 7 hours another storm will hit the Philippines! How shit is that? Oh btw they say its stronger than hurricane Katrina! Ahahahaha… So much for being in the typhoon belt… Thank you! I feel that a lot people here got traumatize by Ondoy, im one of them. Well actually this starts way back the last time that I got stranded after watching The Half-blood Prince. I had a great time ogling at Daniel Radcliff the next thing I know im surrounded by water! The flood scares the hell out of me! I don’t know how to swim for God sake! It wont directly hit Manila but the tail of it will… They say that the moment it hit land an automatic category of signal #4 will be tag on it… and a lot more of shit forecast that even the Main forecast wished this aint real!

Its gloomy outside since yesterday, no rain, not yet. But the darkness and silence is really creeping me out. The wait is killing me, like you’ll never know what you’ll get! Well We don’t want any that’s for sure! My former blockmates are supposed to see each other tomorrow for our little donation drive for a few of our classmates, but I guess it has to wait. Let’s just wish no more people will be affected again.

I super wish for a bright day. WHEN?

No electricity later tonight. I don’t know when it will come back. How many lives should be cut off from this world? I don’t know… too many questions.

Oh God I’ll be waiting for a rainbow. A bright shiny sky. Nice blue sky.

Oh while the whole Philippines await the Shit typhoon can you guys VOTE!

PLEASE VOTE FOR ARASHI IN CHANNEL [V]!!!

No Electricity guys for I don’t know how long… just make them number one for me and the rest of the fangirls here in the Philippines. Please! THANKS GUYS!

Till the typhoon’s gone and a better day is born!